Sometimes in life we control when shit happens. Other times, it just….well….happens. I have spent most of my life playing the victim role when it happens to me unexpectedly, but have recently decided to make a choice of acceptance.
I feel I have grown a lot over the past month, and it has been one hell of a roller coaster for me. I have gone from complete agoraphobic, to leaving my house every day. When I leave, I panic like crazy, and still have that horrid urge to turn the car around, and go home. I manage though, and learn to be stronger every day.
The realization came to me the other day (in therapy) what has happened that has changed my life 180 degrees in the past year. I had a traumatic experience, without even realizing it happened. This is when we say “shit happens”. There is nothing I can do about changing this event. I have chosen my fate this time, and have to deal with the consequences.
Yes, there are things I should have done in hind sight to protect myself, but I never saw it coming. I was naive, and put all my faith in another person. So I have learned my lesson, and will no longer play the victim role. I accept what has happened and move forward making the best of what I have. I am learning to love my life from scratch, and will continue to grow and learn each day.
Having OCD sucks, but I am sick of being labeled a weirdo because I do things differently than others. So what if I fear germs and wash my hands excessively, or that I have to do things in a very specific way, and if I forget a step, have to start the routine all over again. This is who I am. I am not a victim of anything. From this point forward, I control my destiny and no one controls me. I have never felt free in my life until today. And all it took was acceptance of the fact that “shit happens”.
Mahalo!
I feel I have grown a lot over the past month, and it has been one hell of a roller coaster for me. I have gone from complete agoraphobic, to leaving my house every day. When I leave, I panic like crazy, and still have that horrid urge to turn the car around, and go home. I manage though, and learn to be stronger every day.
The realization came to me the other day (in therapy) what has happened that has changed my life 180 degrees in the past year. I had a traumatic experience, without even realizing it happened. This is when we say “shit happens”. There is nothing I can do about changing this event. I have chosen my fate this time, and have to deal with the consequences.
Yes, there are things I should have done in hind sight to protect myself, but I never saw it coming. I was naive, and put all my faith in another person. So I have learned my lesson, and will no longer play the victim role. I accept what has happened and move forward making the best of what I have. I am learning to love my life from scratch, and will continue to grow and learn each day.
Having OCD sucks, but I am sick of being labeled a weirdo because I do things differently than others. So what if I fear germs and wash my hands excessively, or that I have to do things in a very specific way, and if I forget a step, have to start the routine all over again. This is who I am. I am not a victim of anything. From this point forward, I control my destiny and no one controls me. I have never felt free in my life until today. And all it took was acceptance of the fact that “shit happens”.
Mahalo!
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